"Is that the best you've got?"

After weeks of avoiding footage of "real Americans" tea partying around the country, I finally decided to see what all the hoopla was all about. After all, I like parties. And, I must admit, seeing all those men dressed in tacky, walmart-esque flag shirts kind of turned me on. Stars, stripes, and the red and blue all on one shirt! Oh baby, only a real man can pull that off! But I digress...back to the teabagging.

My initial reaction to it all was to just skip those articles when I was browsing online for my daily news fix. Jon & Kate-- check! Something Kardashian-- uh huh! Michelle's new hairstyle/shoes/workout routine--yup! Teabaggers-- I'll pass. But after Joe Wilson's 'You Lie!' outburst and Jimmy Carter's statements, I decided to see what is really up with all these angry, flag-wearing dittoheads (Did they not get the message that being angry on t.v. is only for black women on reality shows? Paging Omarosa or every black girl on Top Model). After brushing up on the teabagging movement, I started thinking, "Is that the best you've got?"

Listen, if I'm going to pack up my stuff, hop in the truck, and drive to DC to protest taxes, ACORN, health care, immigrants, bail outs, elitists, abortion, and black presidents- my sign would have to be on point. Communist? Socialist? Elitist? Are we just throwing out things that end in -ist without making distinctions? Can one man be all of these things at once? What's next, Kenyan-ist?...Oh wait, Glenn Beck just said he was a racist. Add that one to the list!!!

While thrown off by many of the signs, I couldn't help but be floored by the signs portraying the Prez as Hitler. WHOA! WHAT? Did I miss something in sixth grade? Hitler was down with the brown? Did he and Jesse Owens have a beer summit after the Olympics or something to celebrate Jesse's performance? Stupid public schools. They've failed me again. I mean, c'mon, teabaggers. Hitler? How cliche. Out of all the psycho, change-bringing men in history, you choose the one that actually liked people who look more like your average teabagger than an ACORN pimp ring facilitator? Couldn't you find someone more commi/soci/elitisty/kenyany/racisty?

Oh, how about Qaddafi?!? Libya's kinda Kenya, right? Or Castro? I hear some Cuban women have abortions all the time. That will prove your 'baby killer' signs right. Oh...no...I've got it! Duvalier. Definitely, Duvalier. Not the baby (that's child play), but the daddy! Brainwashing school children, control of the media, noirism, and I think someone said tonton macouts translates to czar. And he's black, too!!! Holy Mackerel, I think I'm on to something! Where's the nearest Walmart? I need to buy a shirt...


Veni vidi vici,

Je Pense

Je Pense is a twenty-something know-it-all with too much sarcasm, too much on the mind, and too little time. Follow on fobblogette.blogspot.com.